Since I’ve been diagnosed, I’ve had many crazy things happen to me mostly because of people’s ignorance on Rheumatoid Arthritis, the invisible illness. I get really upset, specially when they’re judging me without knowing what’s going on. I have several of these stories, and the thing that they all have in common is, at first they really upset me, and now they kinda make me laugh. One of the most common things that I’ve had to deal with is people giving me the stink eye when I park in the handicap zone. It happens all the time, so I hardly ever pay attention whenever it happens.
A few years back, I went to the mall and decided I didn’t know how tired I’d be after the walk around the mall, so I parked in the handicap zone. As I was parking, this lady in her 50s walked right by my car along with her mom who was like in her 70s maybe; they both gave me the stink eye, but like I said, it happens all the time so I didn’t think much of it. I got off of my car and the younger lady yells at me across the parking lot that I don’t qualify to park there. I had my handicap placard, so I just look at her and say, “but I do,” and I turned around and kept walking. She yelled again that she was going to call the police, and I told her to go right ahead and walked into the mall. I walked around for about 45 minutes, until I got tired and went back out. As I’m going out, I see this minivan parked right behind my car. My first thought was “it’s the crazy lady” but then I thought better of it, and realized normal people don’t have 45 minutes to waste in a parking lot just to prove a point and ruin somebody’s day. I was wrong.
I got inside my car, turned it on, and waited, maybe the driver was just waiting for someone to get out from the mall. After a couple of minutes, I got frustrated, and honked… nothing. I look in my rear-view mirror, and sure enough, it was the crazy lady from earlier and her mom. They decided to lock me in until the police got there. I realized she was on the phone and she seemed very upset, so I decided to wait until the police got there to get her to move. After about 15 minutes, I was losing my patience, and was tempted to get off the car and go yell at them and tell them to move. I thought about the possible outcome, and the only outcome I could come up with from such a crazy person was that she’d get out and physically fight me… Like I said, my thoughts are usually what makes these stories funny. I pictured her getting out of the car and pushing me or something, and her and her mom ganging up on me. Now, I’m not gonna lie, I was actually scared of getting my butt kicked by a 50 and a 70 year old lady, I couldn’t even outrun them, so I decided it was better if I stayed in my car. Of course, they were thinking I was perfectly healthy, so they wouldn’t attack a young woman who would be stronger than them, but I didn’t think about that then. By this time, I’d already been stuck in my car for like 25 minutes, I started becoming even more upset and impatient when I saw this security guard come out of the mall. He signaled me to stay in the car, and went to talk to the ladies, afterwards, he came to my car and explained the police wasn’t coming because it was a private property, and that the ladies wanted me to get some kind of fine or something anyways, so they wouldn’t leave until the police came. The security guard told me he was trying to calm them down and inform them that if the police did come, I could press charges and they’d be arrested. This gave me the biggest smile ever. I told him to tell them that if they didn’t move I’d call the police and accuse them of harassment, discrimination and keeping me against my will for what was now close to 40 minutes. They got the point and backed away. I thought that was the end of that, but the crazies were even crazier than I imagined, and actually followed me around for several blocks until they finally gave up.
Now this story is funny to me for several reasons. One, I find it insane for someone to spend an hour and a half of their valuable time trying to screw someone else over without knowing all the facts. Another reason I find this funny, and this is usually why I find everything funny is my train of thought… At first I was so angry, then surprised that they’d wait so long, and then I was actually scared that some 50 year old lady was going to try to hit me in the middle of a parking lot and I’d be defenseless. You should’ve seen how that fight went on in my head, it was hilarious to think of a lady my grandma’s age (the one in her 70s) pushing me down and kicking me while I was down… it was like straight out of a comedy movie.
Don’t get me wrong, I get upset too when I see someone who seems healthy park in the handicap zone IF they don’t have a placard or license plates to state they can park there, but I’ve NEVER gone to the extent of locking them in their parking space. I’m not saying I always laugh it off, when it happens I’m furious, but later on when I’m thinking about it, I find it hilarious how I must be one of very few people to be afraid that a seventy-something-year old lady is going to beat me up. Seriously? But at that moment, I’m just made aware of my limitations and realize that if a five year old can bring me down, maybe a lady in her 70s can too. I’ve since realized that if I’m ever in a similar situation, I’ll just call the cops myself, plus I carry pepper spray, just in case some senile old person tries to attack me. There’s a lot of ignorance about “invisible illnesses” out there, so if I’d let it ruin my day every time I encounter someone who doesn’t know young people can be handicap too, I’d never be happy. So I just make the best of it, and realize how there’s always something funny to every story. I can’t think of anything that’s ever happened to me, even in my darkest days, when I don’t have something hilarious that crossed my mind or I actually did to go along with every story. It’s awesome to have only one day ruined by a crazy person, but have a lifetime to remember the hilarity of it all.